| (no subject) |
[Jun. 22nd, 2004|10:07 am] |
ABOUT YOU
Your full name:: matthew abrams
Age:: 15 almost 15
Height:: like 5'6 or 5'7
Natural hair colour:: dirty blonde
Eye colour:: blue
Number of siblings:: 1 sister
Glasses/contacts?:: glasses....wanna get all black contacts
Piercings:: left ear nd right....i had my lip but i took it out :-/.....i wanna get my eyebrow, lip, nipple, and the thingy inbetween ur eyes periced......nd more on my ears
Tattoos:: i have a heart on my leg....its burrned tho
Braces?:: nah
FAVOURITE
Colour:: purple, black, nd pink
Band:: ummm........twiztid
Song:: she said........or 2nd hand smoke(remix)
Stuffed animal:: this puppy....its so cute:-)
Video game:: dont have 1
TV show:: ummm...prob aahh real monsters....or leave it to bever
Movie:: dont kno
Book:: behind the paint
Food:: anything
Game on a cell phone:: one
CD cover:: carnival of carnage
Flower:: dead roses
Scent:: idk?
Animal:: kittys<3
Comic book:: none
Cereal:: froot loops........or lucky charms
Website:: www.realjuggalettes.net or www.psychopathictraders.com
Cartoon:: aahh real monsters
DO YOU
Play an instrument?:: used to
Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?:: idk i never times it
Like to sing?:: not realy
Have a job?:: nope
Have a cell phone?:: used to
Like to play sports?:: nah i skateboard
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?:: yup
Have a crush on someone?:: yup
Live somewhere NOT in the united states?:: ummm i wish
Have more than 5 TVs in your house?:: nah not at my grandmas my old house i did
Have any special talents/skills?:: nope
Excercise daily?:: hell no
Like school?:: yeah if it wasnt 4 skool we wouldnt have friends(not that i have many)
CAN YOU
Sing the alphabet backwards?:: nope
Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes?:: h/o let me try................yeah it hurts like a mofo tho
Speak any other languages?:: does jiberish count?
Go a day without food?:: nope
Stay up for more than 24 hours?:: yeah
Read music, not just tabs?:: not anymore
Roll your tongue?:: idk
Eat a whole pizza?:: prob.........depends
HAVE YOU EVER
Snuck out of the house?:: yup
Cried to get out of trouble?:: nope
Gotten lost in your city?:: haha no im not that downsyndrome
Seen a shooting star?:: i think
Been to any other countries besides the united states?:: bahamas........st thomas
Had a serious surgery?:: nope
Stolen something important to someone else?:: not that i recall
Solved a rubiks cube?:: ive gotten 2 sides
Gone out in public in your pajamas?:: yup
Cried over a girl?:: :-/ yup
Cried over a boy?:: nope
Kissed a random stranger?:: like just randomly walk up to some1 nd kiss them? nah not that i rembre.....but i have with people ive just met
Hugged a random stranger?:: yup
Been in a fist fight?:: yup
Been arrested?:: :-/ yup
Done drugs?:: :-/yup......drug free is the way to be tho
Had alcohol?:: yeah.....waste of time
Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?:: nope
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?:: all the time
Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?:: no
Swore at your parents?:: all the time
Been to warped tour?:: nah
Kicked a guy where it hurts?:: yup
Been in love?:: idk it doesnt matter anyway b/c it would be the past nd fuck the past
Been close to love?:: 4 me.....yeah idk bout the other person
Been to a casino?:: yeah i was like 8
Ran over an animal and killed it?:: nah dont drive to often
Broken a bone?:: yeah
Gotten stitches?:: yup
Had a waterballoon fight in winter?:: nope
Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?:: no
Made homemade muffins?:: idk
Bitten someone?:: yeah......i bit some1's tit i 4got who tho....she was pissing me off i think so i was like u kno what nd bit her titty
Been to disneyland/disneyworld?:: nah
More than 5 times?:: ^i never went there
Been to niagra falls?:: nope
Burped in someones face?:: idk
Gotten the chicken pox?:: yup
WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU
Brushed your teeth:: when me grandma decided to wake me up a 7 and yell at me for a hour
Went to the bathroom:: last night
Saw a movie in theaters:: idk
Read a book:: finished 1 a few days ago
Had a snow day:: 4/5 months?
Had a party:: idk
Had a slumber party:: haha idk prob 5th grade 6 th grade
Made fun of someone:: umm not sure.....i dont do that often nd be serious about it im usaly just jokeing
Tripped in front of someone:: idk
Went to the grocery store:: no clue
Got sick:: yestorday i felt like shit
Cursed:: today
PICK ONE
Fruit/vegetables:: fruit
Black/white:: black
Lights on/lights off:: depends on the situation
TV/movie:: doesnt matter as long as the movie is good
Car/truck:: car
Body spray/lotion:: idk?
Cash/check:: cash
Pillows/blankets:: blankets.....u can fold them up nd use em as a blanket
Headache/stomach ache:: stomach ache
Paint/charcoal:: idk?
Chinese food/mexican food:: both i guess
Summer/winter:: fall
Snow/rain:: neathir/.....just cloudy
Fog/misty:: misty
Rock/rap:: rock
Meat/vegetarian:: meat
Boy/girl:: girl
Chocolate/vanilla:: vanilla
Sprinkles/icing:: icing
Cake/pie:: cake
French toast/french fries:: french fries
Strawberries/blueberries:: strawberries
Ocean/swimming pool:: pool
Hugs/kisses:: depends.....id have to go with kisses...not h/u but like kissing on the lips
Cookies/muffins:: cookies
p33n/bewbz:: wha
Wallet/pocket:: pocker
Window/door:: window
Emo/goth:: depends......
Pink/purple:: eh pink by a little
Cat/dog:: kitty
Long sleeve/short sleeve:: long
Pants/shorts:: pants
Winter break/spring break:: spring
Spring/autumn:: auttum
Clouds/clear sky:: clouds
Moon/mars:: moon
FRIENDSHIP
How many friends do you have?:: not gunna count
What are their names?:: not gunna list all my friends i kno i dont have much but still
Do you have a best friend?::
Have you ever liked one of your friends?:: yup
Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?:: idk
Have you ever lost a friend?:: as in died?? nah
Have you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend?:: yeah
Whats an inside joke between you and a friend?:: noyb
Have you ever gotten in a big arguement with a friend?:: yeah
Whats the nicest thing youve ever done for a friend?:: idk
Whats the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?:: idk
Do you miss any of your old friends?:: i guess
What friend have you known the longest?:: idk
Do you regret anything youve done to a friend?:: yeah
If so, what is it?:: nah cant say
How often do you spend time with your friends?:: idk as much as i feel like it
Do any of your friends drive?:: nah
Has a friend of yours ever died?:: nah
Whats the dumbest thing youve done with a friend?:: idk
What do you think your friends think of you?:: that kid matt is a waste of life
LOVE AND ALL THAT CRAP
Have you ever been in love?:: fuck u
If you have, with who?:: fuck u
Are you single?:: nah
Are you in a relationship?:: umm if im not single then ud think so
If so, for how long?:: not even a week
Do you believe there is someone for everyone?:: no but 4 almost every1
What is your idea of the best date?::
What was your first kiss like?::
How old were you when you got your first kiss?:: kindergarden:-x
Do you think love is a load of shit?:: nah
Whats the best experiance youve ever had with the opposite sex?:: honestly i have no clue
If you are single, have you had any boyfriends/girlfriends before?:: im not single
Have you ever been dumped?:: yup
Have you ever dumped someone?:: yup
Whats the most sexual thing youve done with the opposite sex?:: sex:-/ big mistake
WORD ASSOCIATION
Slippers:: feet
Hat:: head
Hard:: sic fuck
Free:: bird
Space:: ?
Taste:: food
Good charlotte:: tards
Red:: blood
Deep:: gashes
Heart:: broken
Cord:: neck
Cheese:: cake
Rain:: cloudy
Work:: waste
Pedal:: car
Head:: hair
Bed:: sleep
Fluff:: pillow
Hardcore:: music
Race:: cracker
Knife:: murder
Jump:: ?
I....
am:: matt
want:: every1 to die
need:: to kill u
crave:: murder
love:: bloody deaths
hate:: quick painless deaths
did:: want to kill u
feel:: like i belong in a psycho assylem
miss:: charles manson
am annoyed by:: goverment
would rather:: die then talk to u
am tired of:: people living
will always:: hate this world
SILLY STUFF
What is your favourite genre of music?:: horrorcore
What time is it now?:: 1042
What day is it?:: tuesday
Whens the last time you called someone?:: last night
How much money do you have right now?:: 15
Are you hungry?:: not anymore
Whatcha doin?:: this
Do you like parades?:: nah
Do you like the moon?:: yeah its pretty
What are you going to do when youre done with this?:: idk
Isnt cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?:: no
If you could have any magical power what would it be?:: i dont know
Have you ever had a picnic?:: idk
Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?:: what u mean?
What about sock em boppers?:: idk
Are you wearing any socks right now?:: yea
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE
funny?:: idk
pretty?:: no
sarcastic?:: at times
lazy?:: sometimes
hyper?:: at times
friendly?:: depends with who
evil?:: nah this world has enough evil in it
smart?:: yeah
strong?:: not realy
talented?:: idk
dorky?:: kinda
ASSOCIATE THESE WORDS WITH SOMEONE YOU KNOW (or dont know)
high:: kottonmouth kings
skip:: idk
dance:: laura
lonely:: every1 at 1 point
pen:: no clue
flower:: idk
window:: still dont know
psycho:: me:-}
brain freeze:: sam......i have a freeze braine
orange:: alli
sassy:: idk
jelly:: idk
FOR OR AGAINST
suicide:: for:-/
love:: depends
drunk drivers:: against
airplanes:: for
war:: against
canada:: for(degrassi)
united states:: against
rock music:: for
gay marriage:: not my concern but they have a right to love who they want nd people who love eachother should be able to get married......fuck bush
school:: untill a certin age
surveys:: for
parents:: against
cars:: for
killing:: fot
britney spears:: against
coffee:: fot
pants:: for
WOULD YOU EVER
Sky dive?:: yup
Play strip poker?:: sure y not
Run away?:: only if i had the money to get to another country
Curse at a teacher?:: have b4
Not take a shower for a week?:: did when i got suspended....it was nasty but i didnt get out of a couch so its not as bad as going to skool nd going out all the time....never gunan do it again
Ask someone out?:: i did a few days ago
Lie to someone to make them think better of you?:: nah
Visit a foreign country for more than a month?:: yup
Go scuba diving?:: did......but it was in a pool
Write a book?:: yeah
Become a rockstar?:: maybe?
Have casual sex?:: nope
LAST QUESTIONS
What shampoo do you use?:: idk the name
Whens the last time you did something sexual with the opposite sex?:: idk
What kind of computer do you have?:: hp shity as hell
What grade are you in?:: 9
Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?:: no
Or just make out?:: thats more like it
How many posters do you have in your room?:: idk
How many cds do you have?:: alot
What time is it now?:: 1051 |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 21st, 2004|06:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  GO DIE | ] |
| [ | music |
| | afi-bleed black | ] |
yup yup 2 day i had my global final.............that was so fucking pointless................i didnt know any of that fucking shit but oh well....................today was shit so far..........all i did was sleep......thats what i do alot tho.................nd im ont in the mood 4 this anymore so im gunna go |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 21st, 2004|02:14 am] |
Last Cigarette: idk a week ago almost
Last Kiss: i kissed some1's neck 2day that count?
Last Cry: yestorday
Last Library Book Checked Out: no clue
Last Movie Seen In a Theatre: idk
Last Book Read: ummm behind the paint for like the 7th time
Last Cuss Word Uttered: bitch
Last Beverage Drank: orange juice
Last Food Consumed: donut
Last Phone Call: dana?
Last TV Show Watched: idk
Last Time Showered: today
Last Shoes Worn: mike carrol limeted eddition
Last CD Played: cryptic collection 3
Last Soda Drank: dr pepper
Last Thing Written: song
Last Key Used: g
Last Words Spoken: dont rembre
Last Slept: last night
Last IM: dont rembre no has been on
Last Ice Cream Eaten: i 4 got
Last Time Wanting to Die: :-x
Last Lipstick: none
Last Time Dancing: 4 got
Last Show Attended: idk
Last Big Car Ride: umm i have no clue
Last thing you smelled: a candle being put out
Last Annoyance: idk
Last Time Scolded: grandma like 5 hours ago
Last Shirt Worn: element shirt
Last Web Site Visited: www.hallsofillusion.com
that made your heart skip a beat: whats that mean
Last movie you watched: elephant....shit movie
Watch it with anyone?: yup
Last time you went to the mall: long time ago
Last person you missed: idk
Last CD you bought: cryptic collection volume 3
Last beautiful thing you saw: ummmmm.........id have to say laura
Senses Fail: Dunno...I dont listen to them |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 21st, 2004|01:47 am] |
[my name is]:matt
[in the morning i am]: going to school to take a test
[i dream about]: alot of random shit
[at night I am]: phone, online, out or dead
-H A V E .Y O U. E V E R . .
[pictured your crush naked?]: yeah i guess at 1 point or another i have
[actually seen your crush naked]: nope
[been in love]: kinda
[cried when someonedied]: nope
[lied]: yea
-W H I C H . I S . B E T T E R-
[coke or pepsi]: COKE
[flowers or candy]: flowerz
[tall or short]: ummm not to shooort like avrage
[beach or mountains]: neathir
[winter or summer]: winter
[Italian or Chinese food]: chink food
[girls or guys]: girls
[cats or dogs]: cats
[crazy or calm]: depends on the situation
[drunk or high]: neathirr...........bad 4 u nd i quit
-W I T H .T H E. O P P O S I T E. S E X-
[what do you notice first?]: how they act [which is worse liking someone who doesn't like you or having someone you don't like, like you] idk it would depend on who like me that i didnt like i guess
-W H O-
[makes you laugh the most?]: dont kno people [makes you smile]: theres a few
[gives you a funny feeling when you see them]:im not sure
[do you have a crush on?]: the person im going out with,,,,,,,,,,,but is that a crush? isnt a crush if they dont know
[has a crush on you?]: no clue
[easiest to talk to]: no1.........its like there all against me.............if not tell me id have some1 to talk to
[do you wanna spend the rest of your life with]: id have to say..............no clue to young but i guess i could pick a person if i had to
[do you wanna make out with]: laura s
[who are you with right now]: me and my pet spider?
[do you hate]: alota people..........almost every1
[wanna kill]: would depend
[wanna be with right now]: laura
[are you talking to online]: no1 is on it is 2
-D O. Y O U .E V E R-
[sit on the internet all day waiting for someone special to I.M. you?]: no ot realy
[save aol/aim conversations]:yeah
[wish you were a member of the opposite sex]: not recently
[cried because of someone saying something to you]: yup
[prank call]: nah to childish
[IM people you don't know]: yeah some times
[stay up really late on aol]: not realy im usaly on the phone
-H A V E .Y O U .E V E R-
[fallen for your best friend]: nott that i rembre [been rejected]: yes
[rejected someone]: yes
[used someone]: like 1 person once...........mistake
[been cheated on]: i think so
[done something you regret]: yup yup
-DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...-
:x: pretty = nah
:x: funny = maybe my stupidity is?
:x: hot = hell to the biz nah
:x: friendly = depends on who the other person is
:x: amusing = idk?
:x: ugly = holler
:x: lovable = idk?
:x: caring = i care bout a serten few people
:x: sweet = can be...........ypu yup
:x: dorky = i guess
DESCRIBE YOUR -
:x: Wallet = none
:x: Hairbrush = idk if i even have 1
:x: Toothbrush = white/green
:x: Jewelry worn daily = none anymore
:x: Pillow cover =black black nd grey
:x: Blanket = black, red/blue
:x: Coffee cup = idk
:x: Favorite shirt = not sure
:x: CD(?s) in stereo right now = cryptic collection volume 3
:x: What you are wearing now = shirt and shorts
:x: Make up = none
-W H O .W A S .TH E .L A S T. P E R S O N-
[who called you]: not sure i dont rembre
[you called]: ummmmmm idk
[hugged]: laura
[you instant messaged]: dont kno i was on at like 5 nd idk
[you laughed with]: people
-D O .Y O U-
[color your hair]:gunna soon
[ever get off the damn computer]: yea
[habla espanol]: wtf...........thats spanish right?.........got that figured out.............now all i need to kno is what it means
-D O .Y O U / / A R E .Y O U-
[obsessive]: with some things?
[could you live without the computer?]: yup
[how many peeps are on your buddylist?]: 192 just deleted some 2day
[what's your favorite color?]: black, pink, red, and purple,
[what's your favorite food?]:ummm maybe pizza
[drink alcohol?]: not realy anymore......dont like drugs anymore
[like watching sunrises or sunset]: i would if i was with a special some1
[what hurts the most? physical pain or emotional pain?]: emotional pain times 4756745
[trust others way too easily?]: hell no
-N U M B E R-
[of hearts i have broken?]: i have no clue
[of continents i have lived in?]: this 1
[of tight friends?]: idk
[of cd's that I own?]: idk alot
[of scars on my body?]: alotish....there healing
- I -
[I KNOW] : ima waste
[I WANT] : u to die?
[I DON'T]: want a black man with a 2 inch penis to rape me(tubbs)
[I HAVE] : a dildo?
[I WISH] : i was with a person
[I HATE] : almost every1
[I MISS] : :-x
[I FEAR] : living 4ever
[I HEAR] : mmusic..............afi
[I WONDER] y people r on this earth
[I LOVE] : :-X
[I ACHE] : my leg
[I CARE] : bout some people
[I ALWAYS] : want to kill some1 or have a contest of psyical pain
[I AM NOT] : a crack head
[I DANCE] : when im by myself
[I CRY] : some people say im 'emo'
[I DO NOT ALWAYS] : masterbate?? like some sick fucks do
[I WRITE] : poems/songs
[I WIN] : contests
[I LOSE] : most of the imte
[I CONFUSE] : guys
[I LISTEN TO] : music, nd people
[I NEED] : get a life
[IM HAPPY WHEN IM] : idk its rrare
[I SHOULD]: die 4 sitting here taking this |
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| no clue |
[Jun. 20th, 2004|03:39 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  psycho | ] |
| [ | music |
| | shock&awe-dark lotus | ] |
ive set my mind not to take shit like this
but if i leave think of everything id miss
lord dont let me slit my wrist
deep down i wanna say
just keep livin by ur ways
thsi world is evil
no1's on my side
just wanna sit in a 6 foot ditch nd hide
ive got no pride, nothing let in this place
every1's against me
nd i cant stand to see ur fuckin face
these r my last days
im done with this place
im off to a better 1
rotting in my grave
ima come back as a monster
nd have suicide as my fav sponcer
im dead
im dead
im good as fucking dead
yuip i worte that shizola...............
today is shit so far i got woken up at 2:35
that sucked i was tiered nd it was like the first time i went to sleep in a cuple of days oh well |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 18th, 2004|09:37 pm] |
What Would You do if..?
I cried:
I asked you to help:
I died from natural causes:
I said I liked you:
I kissed you:
I was hospitalized:
I ran away from home:
I got in a fight and you were there:
I got pregnant/Impregnated a girl:
I got dumped:
What Do You Think Of My..?
Personality:
Eyes:
Face:
Hair:
Clothes:
Voice:
Humor:
Choice of music:
Body:
Poetry(since no one ever seems to comment):
Would You..?
Spread rumors about me:
Keep a secret if I told you one:
Hold my hand:
Take a bullet for me:
Keep in touch:
Love me:
Have Sex with me:
Ditch me:
Use me:
Date me:
Beat me up: |
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| yup yup |
[Jun. 18th, 2004|09:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  pain! | ] |
| [ | music |
| | wrong with me (remix) | ] |
today was great un till when ever i got home me nd alias were beating the shit outa eachother with sticks nd just doing realy stupid shit
yeah im realy bored nd nuttin happened today
realy
wait.......
somethin did
I FUCKING FOUND OUT I FUCKING PASSED MY MOTHER FUCKING MATH REGENTS YEAH BITCH U FUCKING CANT FUCK WITH THAT FUCKIN SHIT |
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| gayy |
[Jun. 11th, 2004|02:44 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crying | ] |
| [ | music |
| | suicide---zug island | ] |
The world is getting colder, shake them haters off my shoulders
I say I'm 730, they tell me I'm bi-polar
You go tell Uncle Sam "No war in Afghanistan"
Or Iraq, or Iran, many people dying man
Shots go off in Bethleham
Even in Jerusalem
Christians killing Mus-a-lims
Tell me what you doing man?
You wanna party at the club? (There's a war going on out there)
You wanna roll around on dubs? (Smell the anthrax in the air)
You wanna hate it all, no love? (Full-fueled flight on US Air)
Just wait and watch out for the scuds (Nine-eleven, I was there)
Hut, two, three, four, No War!
Hut, two, three, four, No War!
Hut, two, three, four, No War!
Hut, two, three, four, No War!
yeah the last weeks been realy shitty but oh well
im mad bored and yup yup
i got suspended 4 lighting a hat on fire(witch didnt catch on fire)..and throwing the lighter at the principal
well im done
</3 |
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| fuck it |
[May. 8th, 2004|09:43 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | ehh crying:-( | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dark lotus------doornail dorthy | ] |
havent updated in a while so yeah
i got a new board......like a week ago nd last night i fucked my ancle up............i was going like 15 mph nd did a varial flip nd when i landed my right ancle collapsed nd i herd a **crackkkkk**
and then i was like shittttttt
yeah
well i havent been in good moods.........idk y but yeah.....well yeah i do im just not putting it in here
***"somethings r missed so much there 4gotten"***
^
isnt that true
in some cases
well yeah people suck i hate them all nd im gunna be going |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 28th, 2004|05:45 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | alone | ] |
| [ | music |
| | twiztid-liquid friend | ] |
1. who are you?
2. are we friends?
3. when and how did we meet?
4. how have i affected you?
5. what do you think of me?
6. what's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. how long do you think we will be friends?
8. do you love me?
9. do you have a crush on me?
10. would you kiss me?
11. would you hug me?
12. physically, what stands out?
13. emotionally, what stands out?
14. do you wish i was cooler?
15. on a scale of 1-10, how hot am i?
16. give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. am i loveable?
18. how long have you known me?
19. describe me in one word.
20. what was your first impression?
21. do you still think that way about me now?
22. what do you think my weakness is?
23. do you think i'll get married?
24. what makes me happy?
25. what makes me sad?
26. what reminds you of me?
27. if you could give me anything what would it be?
28. how well do you know me?
29. when's the last time you saw me?
30. ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. do you think i could kill someone?
32. are you going to put this on your livejournal and see what i say about you? |
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| doo doo |
[Apr. 3rd, 2004|09:45 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  stressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | blaze---saterday afternoon | ] |
yeah shit is shit and shit is happening..........all bad shit each day its worse and worse and harder and harder to stay but anyway who cares.........................
im bored nd have nothing to write about besides nothing
well 2day i skated with some kids that r in 4th grade(im kool i kno) nd was teaching them shit
and then i was looking for paysite hacking programs to hack the site www.nodoze.net
im thinking of playing neopets thats a great sit i have to make a new name n shit tho i 4 got my old ones |
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| whats da point |
[Mar. 28th, 2004|08:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | stressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | i hurt my slef-------dark lotus | ] |
ehhhh everythings fucked up
people say xtine asked pat out on friday
she says she did 2 weeks ago not this friday
her parents hate me.........nd she clames that is the only reason she broke up with me b/c she wasnt nd isnt allowed to see me........idk anymore who to belive.............wow she told me her parents think i hang out with them to get action that fucked up.........they r my friends n i love christine i wouldnt do that shit that made me mad.........oh well doesnt matter nothing does amymore its all pointless
i tried to end my pain.........but only brought more
yeah im bored n trying to keep my mind off things like suicide, drugs, and shit like that............thats y im updateing nd i havent in awhile
well last night i got talked outa doin somethin stupid by alex n mar............idk y i let them talk me outa it but oh well
***suicidal
ninja*** |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 22nd, 2004|08:22 pm] |
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life whats the point we all die in the end.....................life=death |
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| finaly |
[Mar. 20th, 2004|01:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | im sexy---dark lotus | ] |
nuttin to realy say at all im bored n tiered
but i finaly got over laura!!!!
it had to happen i was in a mind trap |
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| life or death |
[Mar. 7th, 2004|03:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | suicidal | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dark lotus-i hurt my self | ] |
whats the best thing go threw in
1) liveing life at its fullest
2) dying b/c u dont give a shit about anything
shit what is with life.............just as i thought i was getting over some1 i love i start to think about them moreeeeeee oh welllllll not like anything in this world matters at all the only thing that does is death its self..........it brings alota pain to some people b/c there pussys n cant handel it but thats them death is a good thing just think of life its a reason to wanna die...............god and self mutalation thats such a good feeling i was good about it since i carved jils name in my arm but............yeah its just the blood gushing, and pain feels so good wow i must sound realy fucked up........well im insane in da membrain
oh well who cares and who will if i dieeeeeeeeee or when i dieeeeeeee
im gone
**suicidal ninja**
(suicide is the only choice 4 u) |
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| shit headssssssssssssssssss |
[Mar. 6th, 2004|11:12 pm] |
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yeah im bored and sleepy but who gives a flying fuck im bored nd pissed................i cant go to the fucking gathering this year |
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| yeah |
[Mar. 2nd, 2004|03:48 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depression | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dark lotus........i wanna die | ] |
i havent written in a while but i realy have nothing to say but heres some poems i wrote over the past week
look into my life
and see all of my pain
clouds over my soul
and continue to dummp rain
rain comes piuring down
and drownds me in my hurt
i pound my silk lined box
as they cover it in dirt
death appears a pleasure
a way of leaving here
please don t cry 4 me
dont wipe away my tear
for in mt silken boc
peace i will finaly find
an eternity of stillnes
a solace for my mind
my life was not worth livin
u are not to blame
please forgive my heartache
in ur heart ill be the same
Life is precious, Love is kind,
If you seek then you shall find.
If this wish can make it true
All good things shall come to you.
Hide not away, come to the light
NEVER give up without a fight.
The Dark is cold, but the Sun is warm
We shall not let you come to harm.
You're not alone, your friends are Here
Don't give in - defeat the fear.
It's not all-powerful, it CAN be beat
You're too good to deserve defeat.
So stay alert, of the Dark beware
If we can, we will help you - this we swear.
Pain is everything that cause your anger.
Although you can't feel the blade, you can vision what caused you to do this.
In the deepest depth of your heart, you know what you are doing is wrong.
never knowing why youy keep on going.
foregetting everything and everyone around.
understanding nothing you cut deeper.
love is something noone ever taughtyou.
So you keep on cutting.
Under-estimating everything you cut until the blood is gushing, instead of drizzling.
Ignoring everything your still still going at it.
Cutting deeper now at another angle.
Instead of slowing down you go faster.
Doing nothing people just stand and watch.
Everything is gone now as you fade away to death.
I've been fighting my demons for fourteen years,
And I've run out of energy to fight.
The sun may be shining outside of this room
But in my soul it's night.
At times I've imagined I'd come out on top
Of the Demons inside of my head.
And in a way I suppose I WAS winning the fight
If I hadn't, by now I'd be dead.
But now the dark clouds have regathered,
And I've lost my last semblance of hope.
Fear and despair have erased it,
And without it there's no way to cope.
My life has no purpose or meaning
There's nothing inside me but fear.
Fear over whether I'll continue
To find life so dark and drear
Because, I'm afraid if this goes on,
There will be only one last path left
And if, in my weakness I take it
I doubt anyone will be bereft…
look into my life
and see all of my pain
clouds over my soul
and continue to dummp rain
rain comes piuring down
and drownds me in my hurt
i pound my silk lined box
as they cover it in dirt
death appears a pleasure
a way of leaving here
please don t cry 4 me
dont wipe away my tear
for in mt silken boc
peace i will finaly find
an eternity of stillnes
a solace for my mind
my life was not worth livin
u are not to blame
please forgive my heartache
in ur heart ill be the same
all this pain
its been treated like a game
but now its not
all the time r being treasured in my mind
only for me later on to find
its been hard
and i was so blind
i could be a dick
but also be sweet
so now as i try to think of u
i always have to cry
the only 1 ive loved
the only 1 who realy cared about me
fuck love
its all pain
u know how it feels when u hit a vain
thats how it is
and how it feels when shes with another
but who am i to say
what i think
im a waste of life
a shit head looking 4 a knife
to get stabbed in the heart
time and time again
its already happend but now its happened for real
What do you do?
What do you do when you don't want to live,
But you're not yet ready to die?
What do you do when the life that you lead
Has turned out to be just a lie?
What do you do when you're so much alone
That it seems like there's no-one at all?
What do you do when you're right on the edge,
With no-one to catch you when you fall?
What do you do when you can't even pray,
Because there seems to be no point to prayer?
What can you do? Who can you call?
When it seems even God doesn't care… |
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| back |
[Feb. 19th, 2004|08:49 pm] |
yeah im ack to lj finaly after gettin hound dogged(annoyed) about it
well yestorday i wole up an idk what i did i 4got but then i went with laura and angie to mc donalds to meet ryan there and we hung out 4 a while and i was constipated that morning but w/e.........then we went to the grave year and shit and then we went to town but i had no fucking money left 4 food and some1 wouldnt give me my fucking weed back cough laura cough
to sell but oh well i got chines food after that and came home and sat here thinking about shit eating yeah what a great fucking mood i was in.........yeah i wish
well im bored and playing scrabble so im gunna peace out |
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| pics |
[Feb. 1st, 2004|07:09 pm] |
 |
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| 2day |
[Feb. 1st, 2004|06:36 pm] |
|
last night i was on the computre till like 5 am then i got off and watched tv and went to slee at 7......i woke up at 11:30 and went to eisa's as 1 i think and gina was there......we wet to starbucks and met marianna there....then i was fighting pigons b/c im kool like that and then we went to cd island and sme other stores and then we wentto marianna's house and chilled 4 a lil while then we went to alex's 4 like 10 min b/c her parents were visitng her dying grandma....and here i amnow |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 31st, 2004|10:15 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none | ] |
yestorday i had a science mid-term witch i cheat on from alex wass, then i went to melissa rafai's house with maedlen ad then i wentto elisa's house and christine came then alex and mariana came. thn we hd to walk to this irls house named amanda i think but christne couldnt go and then we went to the movies, and then me and gina went to elisa's house n thats all that happened then........
2day i woke up at 11 and called elisa ad she was like <3alex and gina r here when r u comeing over so i said 20 min and i wet there we "chilled 4 a lil and the went to starbucks and then we went to alex's house then her parents and went t mariana's house n then me her n elisa went Micky D's then we went to marians house and gt a ride to elisa's and chilled and here i am YUPPPPP
pease homie!?!?!?!?!?!?!? |
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| love you(poem) |
[Jan. 29th, 2004|08:20 pm] |
we i look n you'r eyes
the pain i have always dies
and i 4get about all the cry's
seeing you is like re-starting life
you make me happy so i put down my knife
for me you are always there
tlling me you realy do care
i trust you so i listen to you
and after that i feel like kissin you
you will get this at the end
it will all become clear
i'll always cnfert you when you;r in fear
and espicaly when you start to tear
if you ever need anything you now im here
the truth is i love you
and in my eyes you will always have a halo above you
not writtin about any1 i just wrote it |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 29th, 2004|06:47 pm] |
What time is it now: 6:20
Your Name: matt
Your Nickname: chuck(in jail they thought i looked like chuck norris) ninja m, and suicidal ninja
Your Online Name:dcshoes191919191.........or juggalo4life19191
Your sex: male
Your color of the phone: white
Your Sign: vergo
Your height: 5'6 or 5'7 i think
Your weight: 115
Hair color: blond want to dye it pink and green but im to cheap to buy the stuff
Eye color: blue alot of people say there realy pretty and cool
Hair length: longish 4 a guy
Do you wear glasses: no but i have them
Are your teeth straight: never had braces
Do you have freckles: i think so or i used to
Do you have a fake tooth: nope
Do you have a fake eye:not that i know of i can see out of both of them
Do you draw fake moles on yourself: no why would i?
Your religion: ummm......none
Highest level of school: in 9th grade only gunna make it to 12 when i can drop out(ill probaly be in 10th from gettin left back so much)
Do you work: nope lookin 4 a job
How do you dress: cloths
Do you smoke: yeah:-/
Do you drink: yeah
Do you do drugs: yeah:-/ never do them they get u messed up, like u commet crimes alot more to get money if ur broke ahhhh they fuck u over if ur gunna do any stick with weed, cheap and fulfilling.......other r to much money and shit
Do you have friends:yeah
Do you have online friends: yeah
Do you like your friends: yeah if i didnt they wouldnt be my friends
Do you like your online friends: yeah
Got any kids? nope
Got any pets? not anymore
Got a car? noo
Live in your own? i wish
Live with your 'rents? yeah it sucks
Favorites:
Type of music: anything from psycopathic records.......juggalo 4 life muda facko
Actor: aston kutcher
Actress:ummm dont know any of their names
Movie: THE GOONIES!!!!!!!!!!!11
Soda: a&w cream soda
Food: idk
Sexual Position: no comment
Car: dont have 1 i want a mustang cant decide what year or a shellby cobra
Hobby: writing songs
Sport: fuck no none
Musician: idk
Artist: idk
Author: joe bruce(a.k.a violent j from insane clown posse)
Anime: no
Song: ummm as of now....y by zug island
Color: black pink and green
TV Show: dont watch tv
Brand of beer: have to say.....ummmmm...any
Brand of liquor: scotch
Brand of smokes: new port, parlament, marbarol
Brand of drug: weed, speed, or x
Brand of clothes: idk
Record Label: psycopathic records
Brand of glue: cement glue it gets u high
Online test: idk
Online chat thing: idk
Shape: broken hear b/c it stands 4 pain
Texture: uhh..what?
Game: no clue
Place: any where basicly
Year:04
Holiday:none hate them all every1 is all happy and crap(i didnt curse)
Quote: dont let the door hit you where the good lord split you
Animal: idk
Sound: farts?
Book: behind the paint
Drink:idk
Sex:
Virgin: no:-/
Butthole a virgin?: fuck yeah im not gay(and i dont have anything against gay people its just im not 1 of them.....but i do have feeling 4 aston kutcher)
mouth a virgin: maybe?
Kinky turns you on:nothing to kinky
More than 15 partners: girlfriends i think but not people ive had sex with
Have sex with music on: nope tv
Had group sex: no
Had a threesome: no
Had cyber sex: yeah
What turns you on: try and find out
What turns you off: not careing, lying, and ummm.....lesbos
is Oral sex good:depends on who does it to me
Do you like sex: ehhhh its ok but i wouldnt do it again unless i was with the girl 4 a long time or i realy truely loved her
Lies:
Have you lied: yes.
Do you lie: not alot
Do you lie often: no.
Do you lie to save your own ass: yes
Do you lie to save someone else ass: yes
Would you tell a lie that stopped your death but caused the death of your lover:no
Would you tell a lie that stopped your death but caused the death of your enemy: depends
Would you tell a lie that let you keep your job but fired your friend: nope
Would you tell a lie that let you keep your job but fired "that bitch you work with": yeah
Have you lied to gain money: kinda
Would you lie to gain money: depends on who im talking to
Do you enjoy lying to strangers: not realy
Have you ever enjoyed lying to a stranger: idk
Do you lie to bums that ask for spare change, saying you have none: nope
Would you dare to lie in the face of evil: nope evil is good y lie to it
Would you dare to lie in the face of your mother: yeah
Would you dare to lie in the face of your God:nope dont belive in him
Have you lied to get laid: nope
Would you lie to get a job: nope
Have you lied to get a job: nope
Would you lie to get a date: nope
Have you lied to get a date: nope
Are lies really that harmless: depends some of them r
Do you lie on online surveys to make yourself seem super cool: nope im proud of being a scrub
Do you lie online: nope
If lying is sinful.. are you going to hell: im goin there anyway
Love life:
Are you single: yeah as of now
Are you with someone: no
Are you married: nope
Are you divorced: nope
Are you "Separated": nope
Are you "on break": nope
Ever been in love: yeah
Looking back do you regret it: nope
Do you date people you meet online:no
Do you date people you meet at bars: nope
Do you date people: yeah
Do you "net date": nope
Are you happy with your current status: not realy i like this girl alex:-D
Are you still holding on to the past: whats that mean?
Do you agree that Jet Li is a good husband for Shajuana: what? who? where? when? why?
The following apply to you? Y/N
Witty: sometimes.
Charming: maybe
Quiet: no
Loud: yes
Pretty: no
Radical: ummmm idk
Sucky: what u mean by that
Smart: in skool no i dont apply myself
Stupid: yes
Dumbass: fudge yeah
Ugly: idk u tell me
Slow: at times
Fast: not realy
Talented: at somethings
Useless: yeah
Punk: idk
Young: yeah
Old: no
Past your prime: what?
Dashing: no.
Daring: no
Dainty: what?
Powerful: yeah im god!......fuck no im weak
Athletic: no
Artistic: no
Superhuman: whats that mean
Sexy: idk
The following are Good/Bad
Sex: at times both
Love: some times realy good and sometimes realy bad
Happiness: bad i hate all happy jolly people
Rap: bad
Pain: good if its physical but bad if its emotinal usaly
Pop music: horrible
Anime: bad.
TV: both
Country: dont like it but its what some people like
Metal: good
Nu-Metal: whats that?
Death Metal: good
Industrial: whats that?
Punk Rock: good.
Easy Listening: idk
Korn: amazing
Murderous Rampages:idk
Sega: i used to have that
Nintendo: old ghett but still kool
Play Station: bad
Game Boy: bad
Chinese Food: good
Italian Food: good.
Japanese Food: idk if its sushie and crap like that then bad
Mexican Food: good....but makes u shit urself and have nasty horrible farts
Online Quizzes: good
Online Surveys: good |
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| new community |
[Jan. 29th, 2004|06:17 pm] |
ok......i created a community called _songs_u_write_
so if u like to write songs or wanna read songs other members have written join!!!! |
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| new song almost done |
[Jan. 29th, 2004|05:23 pm] |
frst i have to say kim is kool(christnes sister)so she wont be mad at me anymore
heres the song
its called
"no hate"
bitch im standing near shangri-la bout to walk in the gate
this place is the shit no1 has fuckin' juggalo hate
im fine bein' here this shis my fate
every1's got a painted face like a wicked clown
its fuckin' great every1's fuckin down
we all got the wicked hair
we help out other juggalos because we care
haters never come here i mean that shit 4 real
if they do they'll feel the pai in their face as we start to peel
guess what bitc we even got a fuckin' god
hes in a suit from the lotus pod
all the shit we do i fine with him he says we just bein' some juggalos and thts good
runnin wit the hatchet, takein drugs, killin, and sometimes robbery shit we just from the hood
*chorus*
when i walk threw the gate i dont se any1 with juggalo hate
*end chorus*
i wouldnt wanna be in anyother place
we got faygos 20 in each case
you'r hittin the bong to slow pick up the pace
fuckin blood shot eye
so im guessin i high?
we do it wicked clown style
fuck that lil bitch from 8 mile(slim anus)
hes gunn die, i kill his fans but shit i havent in a while
what a big ass hater who tels lies
lives in a trailer with mad fucin flies
never gets to tap a cherry pie
hes a fudge packer
could a hater be any wacker?
but no back to the hit bout shangri-la
*chorus*
when i walk threw the gate(threw the gate)
i dont see any1 with juggalo hate(no juggalo hate)
tmes 2x
*end*
*chorus*
when i walk threw the gate(the fuckin gate)
i dont se any1 with juggalo hate(no fuckin' juggalo hate)
times 2x
*end*
while urcrew is sendin' u mail
my homes is gettin me out on bail
you'r crew is just to fucki' stale
thats all i have 4 now |
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| yup |
[Jan. 29th, 2004|03:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | never say forever | ] |
today was boring with the english mid-term i guessed on most of the multible choice...and bull shitted my whole essay...but they said nexttime i get to use a computer b/c myhand-writing is shit thats kool i guess b/c i can go on-lin if i want so yeah...........
yetorday i went to christines and jil was there......i was depressed b/c i still like her alot and shit......bunt w/e its nver gunna hppen again.......so when i got home i was talking to dana and she decided im going on operation jil(the jil is sosed to be crossed out but idk how to do it on here) she told me to go ask some random person i lke out so i wont like jil anyore.....idk if that'd work tho but thanx 4 the help dana!
anyway afterbeing at chrisines 4 a lil while we went to alex's house and went to mc'donalds and met 2 other people there.....alex is realy pretty!! but anyway then me, christine, an jil went to elisa's house to watch the movie thirteen......i only saw part of it but it was good till the part i saw so idk if the whole movie is good. then i got home wet on-linethen called elisa and then called christine, and then i called sam at lik 10:15 and stayed ont the phone with her till like 3am yeah we talked bout alota shit but i dont rembre all if it cuz i was tiered, and thats all that's realy happened to me snce my last post
bye bye |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 27th, 2004|11:34 pm] |
[ Friends ]
Are you popular: fuck no
Do your friends really know you: idk maybe
Are there traits in you, that are universally liked: i dont care what they think but i guess funny and odd?
Do you trust others easily: nope
Have you lost any friends: yeah but who cares
Do you have more guy, or girlfriends: ummmmm more friends that r girls
Ever stolen a friends boyfriend/girlfriend: nope but ive been stolen
[ Love Life ]
Is there a difference between a crush and being in love: fuck yes
Are you (honestly) afraid of commitment: depends on who its with
Are you attracted to people with accents: fuck no....well not usaly
Do long distance relationships work: they work just ass good as a 90 year old mans cock
Do you prefer to move fast, or slow in a relationship: depends on who im with
Are you usually the first to ask a person out: ummmm no?
[ Appearance ]
Do you think you look attractive: i dont care
Do you have any freckles: yeah.
Describe your style: idk look at me and decide ur self
Ever go to a beauty salon: nope
What do you think others think of your style: dont care
How long would it take you to get ready each morning: 5 min if i shower th night b4
[ Personality ]
What first impression do you often give others: yeah idk
Do you think you're a friendly person: at times
Have you ever hurt anyone unintentionally: yuppers
Are you mean: sometimes.yupperrs
Are you smart: fuck no
Are you outgoing: idk what does that mean
Are you confident in yourself: at times
[ The Future ]
Where do you see yourself in 10 years time: dead or jail
Where would you like to be in 10 years time: d*e*a*d
Future job: record deal with psycopathic records
Future car: ummmmm hurse
At what age would you like to be married: who knows
Your idea of the perfect wedding: ummm i never though bout it
[ Current ]
Clothes: sweat pants and sweatshirt
Make up: not as of now
Mood: bored
Music: none
Taste: none
Hair: long?
Color of nails: last time they were pink but that was over the summer
[ Last Person ]
You hugged: i dont know
You fought with: grandma
You played dress up with: i dont know
You emailed: no clue
You instant messaged: chinky
You kissed: idk christine?
Who yelled at you: grandma
Who broke your heart: eek...
[ Random Questions ]
Do you find it uncomfortable without a bra: nope i dont have tits im a guy
Do you feel pity for people who commit suicide: nope its what they wanna do
Choose one word to describe how you feel most often: depressed
Do you dream at night time: yeah
Are you right-handed, left-handed, or ambidextrous: right
What do you fear: dying fast without pain i wanna die slow with pain
Who is the hottest girl/guy in your school: who cares looks dont matter
Who do you really hate/dislike: to many |
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| yeah |
[Jan. 27th, 2004|02:59 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | im alriht--twiztid | ] |
yeah iwoke up at 6:30 2day and went to skool at 8:10 and i took the global mid-ter it was easythen i went to ginos ith kim, alex, aron, and alias then i went back toto skool t take my spanish mid-term ihad o fucking clue what i was doing and yeah i guessed on every question so i gt some right hopefuly b/c they were multipal choice......and on my global essay i bull shited threw the whole thing i kinda had a clue wha i as doing
im gunna go now im bored ill poast again later i think |
|
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 26th, 2004|10:36 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | blank | ] |
| [ | music |
| | slit my wrist-murderdolls | ] |
yey i have my fucking math regence in 2 hours......this sucks
on saterday i went to the image and saw patened pendings, justice city villans, and never say foever.......there were some other people there but i had to leave b4 they came on
i dont have anything to say realy.........still realy depressed tho and shit so yeah |
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| depressed |
[Jan. 23rd, 2004|09:47 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crying stll | ] |
| [ | music |
| | mother fucker i dont care--murderdolls | ] |
yeah im still crying since yestorday........but i didnt in skool but that was kinda hard since i upset like none other thanx 4 not careing but saying u did jil it means alot to me :'(......every time she signs on, or i think of her of some1 says smethig abou her i start to fucking cry its sick how much i fuckin care about her.......no its beond sick, yeah i got attached.....but i was warned about her by a unnamed person....but i didnt listen to them....and they were right im sorry 4 not beliving u(u shold kno who u r i talked to u last sat if ur reading this) yeah ummmmm a little tip of advise never giveur heart fullyaway it screws u over s badly i mean i even asked her if she realy did care the night b4 all this shi happened and she said ye but then she goes and changes her mind and says no, i dont think ive been screwed over worse then that in my life but if i was it was by laura m....but we would like get back 2geather the next day usaly or realy soon...enough about her tho.....jil is so amazing id serioously do anything 4 he to care the least amout 4 me but thats not gunna happen but if it did id piss myself id be so fucking happy(maybe even shit myself)
life is going by realy slow and shitty right now but oh well....i am trying to pull threw this long "emotinal brake down" but its realy hard to lose the thing u cared about most its so painful.....i usaly like pain but not this kind of pain thi is like emotinal pain...i like physical pan a lot better.....that shit is soothing but emotinal isjust ehhhhhhish i cant realy explane it its to hard...and jil if r reading this i just want u to know i will always love u and if u ever want help with anything id be happy to..or if u ever feel the same about me as i do with u(chances are 1/122321372634236434 but thats still a chance right?!?!?!?!?!)even if we could just be frieds id be happy.
well im gunna go i guess
suicidal ninja(changes it from ninja m to that)
muther fucker i dont care--murderdolls
I hate your voice and I hate your face
Exterminate you from the human race
Life’s a joke and the joke is on you
Hey you, it’s true, you suck, fuck you
I hope and pray every day
I’ll get the news that you passed away
So take your life and turn it off
Goodbye, so long, get lost, fuck off
[chorus]
I don’t care, motherfucker I don’t care
I don’t care motherfucker
Suicides the only choice for you
To see you dead would be a dream come true
Slit your wrist and show God who’s boss
Goodbye, so long, get lost, fuck off
Why don’t you do the whole world a favor
Connect your throat to the nearest razor
Or do you need it spelled out for you
Well F.U.CK.Y.O.U.
[chorus]
Motherfucker I don’t care
Motherfucker I don’t care
[chorus] |
|
|
| the convo i talked about on my other post with jil |
[Jan. 23rd, 2004|03:14 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | tearing | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none | ] |
DcShOeS191919191 (8:03:52 PM): hey
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:03:54 PM): hey
DcShOeS191919191 (8:04:02 PM): whats up?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:04:11 PM): nm u
DcShOeS191919191 (8:04:28 PM): same saem
DcShOeS191919191 (8:04:30 PM): *same
DcShOeS191919191 (8:04:53 PM): u kno that girl who told me i dont love u like 4 or 5 days ago?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:05:00 PM): arright.. look I'm literally crying here.. but I need to say something here
DcShOeS191919191 (8:06:14 PM): is it bad?/
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:06:16 PM): I'm not meant to have a boyfriend... I'm a huge ass flirt.. I flirt with everyone... I go looking for love.. and I take the first thing I see, and that's not how it's supposed to be.. and I'm trying to save the both of us here... I don't want you to get any more hurt than I know you're going to be, but I figured If I lied to you, you would hurt a lot more
DcShOeS191919191 (8:06:40 PM): ?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:06:54 PM): I'm telling you the truth..
DcShOeS191919191 (8:07:01 PM): so u dont love me?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:07:13 PM): it's not that I don't
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:07:54 PM): but I think first off it was way too early to say so, and second.. I went sticking my nose into a room of guys and chose the first one who looked at me (figure of speech)
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:08:05 PM): I'm a flirt.. I always look for manly attention..
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:08:29 PM): at school, everyone thinks I have 17 boyfriends cause I'm always hugging everyone
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:08:55 PM): nd I'm always flirting.. and it's not right.. It's wrong 4 me to have a boyfriend.. and I'm really angry at myself for getting invlolved and hurting you
DcShOeS191919191 (8:09:58 PM): yeah ok i swear i fucking belive u
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:10:27 PM): u dont
DcShOeS191919191 (8:10:40 PM): no shit\
DcShOeS191919191 (8:10:58 PM): u dont fucking know how much fucking feeling i have 4 u
DcShOeS191919191 (8:11:38 PM): but matt has to be a fucking idot
DcShOeS191919191 (8:11:41 PM): and
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:11:44 PM): well I am I really am.. I'm sorry.. I'm just not meant to have a boyfriend.. I don't know how to act, I don't know how to treat someone who loves me.. cause all I'm looking for is manly attention from any guy.. and it's not the right thing to do
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:12:12 PM): even when I was going out with Joe for 4 months.. I went looking for hugs and stuff from any guy
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:12:24 PM): Im not meant to be loved
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:12:32 PM): and i'm not meant to have a boyfriend.
DcShOeS191919191 (8:12:34 PM): hugs dont mean shit
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:12:43 PM): and stuff
DcShOeS191919191 (8:13:08 PM): i huged like 4 people 2day but then again 1 wasent wanted and the others were as fucking friends
DcShOeS191919191 (8:13:30 PM): but how fucking stupid am i 4 fucking ever beliving the shit that u said to me
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:14:26 PM): fine. u know what.. if u don't ever want to talk to me again I understand.. but u know that if god forbid anything happened to you I would die? but my words mean nothing.. to anyone.. nothing to the world.. anything I gave means nothing to a world who hated me..
DcShOeS191919191 (8:16:45 PM): yeah i just fuckin hated u right what about that fucking song i wrote.......u dont kno how hard that was 4 me to write i mean its hard as fuck 4 me to say i love some1 and mean it b/c the last girl i loved fucked me over like 20 times and ive been scared to get to close with any1......but i met u nd i think ur the most amazing person ever but i had to be a stupid fuck and just get fucked over again
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:18:22 PM): look.. I said I was sorry.. would you rather I had lied and hurt you weeks later? would you rather me sit here and lie to your face.. lie while staring you square in the eye? only for you to find out in the end that it meant nothing? I thought I was helping you by telling you before things got any deeper
DcShOeS191919191 (8:20:17 PM): thanx i ment nothing maybe it fucking would have worked if u told me b4 i started to love u or when i asked u out u could have fuckin said no
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:21:48 PM): look.. would you be happy if I killed myself right now? with all this stress i can't do anything Matt, I have no fucking life, my friends are all bull shit artists, I have no hobbies, nothing.. I've lost everything I had because of other things.. and I can't take life anymore.. So stop makin it worse.. I WAS TRYING TO HELP, but like I said.. nothing means anything anymore..
DcShOeS191919191 (8:25:04 PM): the only thing that ment shit to me is u.....and christine b/c shes the greatest friend i could ever fucking have.......i can fuckin count on her shes always there trying to help me and i tell her everything and im always gunna be there 4 her
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:25:05 PM): ooo
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:25:33 PM): look, I didn't try to hurt you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Auto response from I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:25:33 PM): fucked over by jil
the pain is realy starting to kill
u dont know what i feel
in my arm i carved ur name
but now im in a life of fucked up shame
i dont care cant stand life
its a fucked up serial killer that uses a knife
to bring a lot of pain
but it can end in the slice of a vain
as the fuckin blood flow starts to gain
i gett happyer and happyer
b/c ill be dead by the time im found
but then ill be 6 feet in the ground
dont worry thats where i wanna be
just dont get fucked over like me
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DcShOeS191919191 (8:43:08 PM): can i ask u y u did this
DcShOeS191919191 (8:43:10 PM): ?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:43:26 PM): Y i decided to tell you the truth?
DcShOeS191919191 (8:43:37 PM): no y u decided to do this to me
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:44:26 PM): look, I told you, I get caught up in a fantasy world, because I am getting attention.. then sooner or later I realize that I'm not doing it because I love someone.. only because I want attention..
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:44:33 PM): and I don't want to lie to you
DcShOeS191919191 (8:44:57 PM): yup all im fucking good 4 is attention to u
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:45:11 PM): Its any guy matt
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:45:13 PM): it's not just you
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:45:16 PM): It's happened b4
DcShOeS191919191 (8:45:25 PM): yeah but thats all im good 4 for u
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:45:30 PM): ITS ANYONE
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:45:48 PM): my friends were right.. ever since Josh died its a new guy every week..
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:45:59 PM): and it's because I can't love again..
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:46:04 PM): but I need the attention
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:46:22 PM): but whatever.. you don't even want to talk to me anymore.. so don't bother.
DcShOeS191919191 (8:46:47 PM): i am right now so i odvisly do..........but 4 ever isnt to long
DcShOeS191919191 (8:47:10 PM): life is fast
DcShOeS191919191 (8:47:14 PM): and its shitty
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:47:19 PM): u think I don't know that
DcShOeS191919191 (8:47:32 PM): thats y i do what ever the fuck i want
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:47:34 PM): I wouldn't b in this position if my boyfriend hadn't killed himself last year matt
DcShOeS191919191 (8:47:48 PM): im guuna be the fucking next binladen
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:48:01 PM): I'll b ur first victim since my life is shit
DcShOeS191919191 (8:48:08 PM): not at all
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:48:12 PM): kill me
DcShOeS191919191 (8:48:21 PM): and if i wanted ur life to be shit ud be the last
DcShOeS191919191 (8:49:25 PM): but i would never have the heart to kill u
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:49:33 PM): well u should.. cause I want to die
DcShOeS191919191 (8:49:38 PM): id rather kill osama........and hes like my fucking idol
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:49:49 PM): whatever.. I want to kill myself
DcShOeS191919191 (8:50:32 PM): im not saying anything to that b/c my feelings dont matter just my and every oither guys attention does
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:51:04 PM): what do you want from me matt?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:51:06 PM): WHat?
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:51:11 PM): I tried to be honest with you
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:51:17 PM): I tried to save you fuck of a lot of pain
DcShOeS191919191 (8:51:28 PM): it didnt save much
DcShOeS191919191 (8:51:35 PM): ur a good actress
I Lub Em0 Boyz (8:51:39 PM): then u know what.. excuse me while I fucking die
DcShOeS191919191 (8:51:42 PM): untill yestorday
I Lub Em0 Boyz signed off at 9:09:28 PM. |
|
|
| fucker |
[Jan. 23rd, 2004|03:00 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | slit my wrist---murderdolls | ] |
ye last night was the worst night in a long ass time.......jil fucked me over she never cared about me.....she just likes "attention" and will do anything 4 it.......i put our convo u here later i dont feel like finging it right now how kool am i i cryed 4 like 30 min on the phone with christine and then i called melissa later on and i cryed after i got off the phone with her......i realy hate love its a serial killer who lke to kil people slow with a fucking knife threw the heart.....fucked up shit
yeah im sorta realy depressed right now so im not gunna make this 2 long.....christine is my bestest friend ever what a kool "gal"(dont ask)...skool was boring i fell asleep in english, math, 1 period of science, and my off period....i was to tiered i was up till like 5:45 crying(i swear im a kool kid)yeah i got fucked over and im still inlove with her ehhhhh she clamed she cared but it was all bullshit fuck that hurts alot...i never spilled my heart like i did withher i fucking caed about her so much but yeah that doesnt matter anymore:'(
well im gunna go |
|
|
| fuck you |
[Jan. 22nd, 2004|05:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | all about the weed----kottonmouth kings | ] |
yah school suked all i did was basicly think about jil........but in 8th priod i had a crayon fight with some people in my globa class that was the only good part i guess........the i got some of the answers to the spanish test thing......that was fucking boring as fucking hell
i came home went on te computer and downloaded some lady getting shot in the head.....it was funny as hell.....and i also downloaded part of thecolimbine shooting in the cafetria and its real......an also got 1 of some guys head blowing up....their great
then i called christine and talked to her white ass 4 a lil bit.........thanks christine 4 talking to me lat night(yeah i cried on the phone with her)im a fag what can i say
nuttin else to fuckin say so im gunna go |
|
|
| yup |
[Jan. 20th, 2004|03:06 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  and sad(miss :-( jil) | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none at the time | ] |
yestorday i was with <3jil<3 from 12:30 till like 7......it was fun then i went home n sat on the computer, boy was that a great thing to do i got bored fast!......but anyway last night i couldnt fall asleep i was just thnking of <3jil the whole night...well atleast untill about 3:30 then i woke up at 5:30 nd snoozed my alarm and got back up at 6:30......the stpid ass(thats y she drives busses b/c shes stupid....but ill be like that 1 day) bus driver didnt come so i got a rid to skool from eddie's mom and rachel got a ride form her also....skool was ok i didnt get cought with my headphones at all witch was good i cant go the wholeday with out music....well i can but its hard
in math 2day i was thinking of jil and i started to write a song ill but it under this and its called
REASON TO LIVE
life if fuck only got 1 reason to live, and alot of love to give, and it all goes to jil the girl that i love, if i didnt have her id be dead in shangri-la(means heaven) up above, i know she realy does care, shell help me threw the times in thile that arent fair, wanna end up with her as my wife, then i'd be appy my whole fuckin life
---chorus---
"life is gay but im gunna stay and see see another day FUCK YEAH i got a reason to live FUCK YEAH im in love FUCK YEAH cuz im in love with jil
****thats all i have so far but ill finish it 2marrow or later when im in the mood****
its been a fe days since ive posted.....but im gunna post more 2day when i steal the survay things |
|
|
| fialy a ne upate |
[Jan. 17th, 2004|10:14 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | im alrigt---twiztid | ] |
havent updated this shit in a long time like 2 week i think
anyway today i was lazy as fuck and did nothing....yestorday i did the same thing but last night i went to hot skates with <3jill<3,christine, and their friends but i dont kno all of their names...
shit lately has been better i guess....no more gay ass hoe named lauren! shes such a fckin biggot i seriously hope she getsed by a horse
but anyway christine ur a great friend i met jill threw u and u got me to ask her out good friend....i want it back!(if u christine just think of what u stole from me in hotskates)
bored off my ass right now and i cant get my fcking counter fucking strike to fucking work it fucking piss me the fuck off grrrr bt oh well who the fuck cares
jill is the coolest person ever:-)...jill i love u
If you're reading this then I finally did it
I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye
There was no time
Understand I was stressed
Living day to day was hard and I gave it my best
But there was nothing left
For me in this world to convince me to stay
Now I'm long gone away
Don't you do that, don't you start those tears
Just remember all the time we spent over the years
Never cry, never think bad of me
What's done is done and that's the way that it had to be
I need you to be strong for me
Say a prayer every day in my memory
I'm sure it's helping me
To earn my feathers, to get some wings
And a halo and a harp and angelic things
And even though I'm gone and outta sight
Never worry about me, I'm alright.
And if I should die
Don't blame yourself and keep it locked inside
I'm alright!!
And everytime you cry
Don't break down and just keep me inside of your mind
I'm alright!!
You only saw the outside
Never knew what I was feeling
Now everyday you lay in bed staring at the ceiling
But you don't see me no more
You can fill your heart with memories and things from before
But everybody got a purpose in life
To survive and when the sun rise
You won't live to see another day
Just don't follow me, and live life your own way
I'll be in set and if you forget
Get the picture with the cord around my neck
Can you handle that?
See me underground and I'm stuck but it's cool
That's where I wanna be
Keep the drama in hand and outta sight
And know that I'ma be alright
And if I should die
Don't blame yourself and keep it locked inside
I'm alright!!
And everytime you cry
Don't break down and just keep me inside of your mind
I'm alright!!
great song..... im alright by twiztid
1-14.....worst day ever it was my moms b-day and my gay ass sep-dad was teir hope he des im going to fuckin kill him one day fucking faggot
got nuttin elseto realy say riht now so im out bitch |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jan. 2nd, 2004|07:33 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crappy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | sticky icky situation---anybody killa-aby | ] |
its jan 2nd........happy new years???
bored as fuck didnt go to sleep till about 10:30 this morning and woke up at like 3 or some shit
pissed off...dont have anymoney 4 some greenz
but oh well im trying to not smoke as much anymore anyway(not like its gunna happen)
merry xmas!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
why r people so anal its annoying
well im outa this bitch im goin to eat
MCL(much clown love)
*Ninja M* |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jan. 1st, 2004|08:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none at the time | ] |
just got home from laurens.....tiered as hell i was woken up a to this afternoon but anyway last night i was a persons house 4 new years it was fun. got home around 3...but sisnt fall asleep till like 5 that was boreing
the ball this year was so fucking ghett....it changed colors i only noticed green and pink tho.
right now im trying to figure out how to get counter strike to work its so fucking gay
well im out of this bitch
Ninja M |
|
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| fuck |
[Dec. 31st, 2003|03:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | insane clown posse.....under the big top | ] |
its 3:20am........another hour till 4:20 yeah bitch...well im bored and waitin till 420 to some some bud......theres no1 to talk to its fuckin gay and i feel like shit i couldnt breth and i keep shakeing 2day it fuckin sucked....but there was a good part of the day i got to hang out with lauren!
im out
*much clown love*
*ninja m* |
|
|
| bio |
[Dec. 31st, 2003|03:20 am] |
BASICS
(1) Your gender: male
(2) Straight/gay/bi?: straight
(3) Single?: no
(4) want to be?: umm....no
(5) Your birth day: august 23rd
(6) Age you act: depends on who im with.....act more mature around people in not as friend with
(7) Age you wish you were: fuck i dont care......i guess 36 because then it is legal to have sex with some1 half your age
(8) Your height: about 5'6-5'7
(9) The color of your eyes: blue
(10) Happy with it?: yeah
(11) The color of your hair?: dirty blonde
(12) Happy with it?: nope want it to be the color of my best frined(weed)
(13) Left/right/ambidextrous?: righty
(14) Your living arrangement?: house
(27) Your family: step-dad(im going to kill him 1 day),mom, sister, grandma(live with her now).....but my more imp family is my juggalo family
(29) What's your job: a student, haveing fun
(30) Piercings?: yes
(31) Tattoos?: soon need the money to but my own tattoo gun
(32) Obsessions?: yeah
(35) Do you speak another language?: fuck no
(36) Have a favorite quote?: yeah........36 years old is significant, because at 36 you can sleep with someone half your age and not go to jail.
(37) Do you have a webpage?: www.feminem.com not mine but its great
DEEP THOUGHTS about life and you in it
(38) Do you live in the moment?: have no clue what that means
(39) Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?: unless they piss me off
(40) Do you have any secrets?: no
(41) Do you hate yourself?: fuck yeah
(42) Do you like your handwriting?: no
(43) Do you have any bad habits?: nope im not 1 of those people who wacks off 15 times a day
(44) What is the compliment you get most from people?: eyes r kool or hair
(45) If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?: life untill sixteen(prob when im gunna die)
(46) What's your biggest fear?: gett dong chopped off while fucking
(47) Can you sing: no but i write rhymes when im bored
(48) Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?: fuck no im not feminem
(49) Are you a loner?: i guess
(50) Are you bored?: most of the time
(51) If you were another person, would you be friends with you?: yeah......id understand that i need i need to steal money from somewhere
(52) Are you a daredevil?: at times but i dont like that name
(53) Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?: yes
(54) Are you passive or aggressive?:
(55) do you like rap?: no.....well its not realy rap but some people concider it rap.....but if u count any1 from psycopathic records rap then yeah
(56) What is your greatest strength and weakness?: i have no clue
(57) If you could change one thing about yourself? my nippples they are to sencitave
(58) There are three wells, love, beauty and creativity, which one do you choose?: creativity
(59) How do you vent?: idk
(60) Do you think you are emotionally strong?: most of the time
(61) Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?: yes
(62) Do you think life has been good so far?: ehhh some of it
(63) What is the most important lesson you've learned from life? some tons of weed any its all good
(64) What do you like the most about your body?: my eyes, hair kinofish
(65) And least?: my feet I guess
(66) Do you think you are good looking?: not really
(67) Are you confident?: ye
(68) What is the fictional character you're most like?: ummm........idk
(69) Do people know how you feel?: ummm.... a few
(70) Are you perceived wrongly?: alot of the time
DO YOU...
(71) Smoke?: yupp yupp hand over anything in a pipe n ill take a few hits
(72) Do drugs?: yes
(73) Read the newspaper?: yeah....look 4 crimes n drug shit
(74) Pray?: ummm....no
(75) Go to church?: once....i was 5
(76) Talk to strangers who IM you?: yeah y not
(77) Sleep with stuffed animals?: not anymore its at my real house
(78) Take walks in the rain?: depends on the mood im in
(79) Talk to people even though you hate them?: yeah but im dissin on then
(80) Drive?: nope
(81) Like to drive fast?: dont drive
HAVE YOU EVER...
(82) Liked your voice?: yup......i was stoned
(83) Hurt yourself?: all the time
(84) Been out of the country?: st. thomas
(85) Eaten something that made other people sick?: yeah.....boggers in like 1st grade
(86) Burped?: all the time
(87) Been unfaithful?: maybe
(88) Been in love?: yes
(89) Done drugs?: yes
(90) Gone skinny dipping?: yup
(92) Had a surgery?: no
(93) Ran away from home?: yea
(94) Played strip poker?: no but ive played strip triva.....but only over the phone(not fun)
(95) Gotten beaten up?: yeah.......kicked in the balls by some girl n couldnt move n she kept on kicking me
(97) Been picked on?: fuck yeah
(98) Been on stage?: ummm idk.....i think so
(99) Been so drunk that you know you're supposed to go out on a date with someone, but you can't remember with who or when and that you faint when you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning, not to mention your breath? no
(100) Slept outdoors?: yes
(101) Thought about suicide?: all the time
(102) Pulled an all-nighter?: yeah(not sex wise havent done that all night yet thatd be to long of a time)
(103) If yes, what is your record?: stayed up for about 5 days then basicly dies
(104) Gone one day without food?: fuck no
(105) Talked on the phone all night?: yeah alot
(106) Slept together with the opposite sex without actually having sex?: no
(107) Slept all day?: yeah
(108) Killed someone?: maybe..well...not yet soon.....
(109) Made out with a stranger?: yes
(110) Had sex with a stranger?: no
(111) Thought you're going crazy? I am crazy
(112) Kissed the same sex?: nope
(114) Been betrayed?: yes
(115) Had a dream that came true?: yeah
(116) Broken the law? ummm lets see ive been in jail so i think yeah
(117) Met a famous person?: yeah a pornstar....but it was in a dream
(118) Have you ever killed an animal by accident? nope do it 4 fun
(146) Stolen anything?: all the time
(147) Been on radio/TV.?: no
(148) Been in a mosh-pit?: yup
(149) Had a nervous breakdown? yeah every time i try to quit somkein weed
(150) Considered religious vocation?: no
(151) Been criticized about your sexual performance?: nopee not yet
(152) Bungee jumped?: no
(153) Had a dream that kept coming back?: yes
CLOTHES and other fashion
(154) Shoe brand?: dcshoes, converse, audio
(155) Brand of clothing?: idk
(156) Cologne/perfume?: what ever I find on my self
(157) What are you normally wearing to school/work?: what ever i find in my closet or draws
(159) Wear hats?: not realy
(160) Judge other people by their clothing?: yeah.....preps....what fuckin biggots
(161) Wear make-up?: fuck yeah......im a juggalo n show clown luv
(162) Favorite place to shop?: www.hatchetgear.com
(163) Favorite article of clothing?: any shit from psycopathic records
(164) Are you trendy?: not really
(165) Would you rather wear a uniform to school?: fuck no
BELIEFS
(166) Believe in life on other planets?: yeah......i belive there is a planet full of juggalos out there
(167) Miracles?: no
(168) Astrology?: what that mean
(170) God? : sorta......my vision of god is a giant juggalo who lives up in da stars
(171) Satan?: fuck yeah
(172) Santa?: nope.....not anymore i killed that fat jolly birch
(173) Ghosts?: yup
(174) Luck?: at times
(175) Love at first sight?: no......have to see the person at least twice
(176) Yin and Yang?: ????????
(177) Witches?: yup
(178) Easter bunny?: nope
(179) Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: im a faithful juggalo n im stayin that way
(180) Believe there's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?: no just a lepercon with a few pounds of weed
(181) Do you wish on stars?: no
LOVE, and all that
(182) Did you get frightened or uncomfortable seeing that as a section title?: no
(183) Do you remember your first love?: yes
(184) Still love him/her?: i dont know
(185) Do you consider love a mistake?: sometimes
(186) What do you find romantic?: ummmmmm......ull have to find out by tryin me
(188) Turn-offs?: dykes
(189) Do you base your judgement on looks alone: no not at all
(200) If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest in dating you, how would you feel?: idk
(201) Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going "blind"?: i dont know
(202) Have you ever wished it was more "socially acceptable" for a girl to ask a guy out?: girls have asked me out so i guess i find it scceptable
(203) Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive?: not really
(204) Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?: no clue
(205) What is best about the opposite sex?: ummmm.....they dont have a dick?
(206) What is the worst thing about the opposite sex?: ahhhh periods=bitches usaly and also no sex(unless u like it bloody)
(207) What's the last present someone gave you?: a dildo.....i wish ummmm dvd player
(208) Are you in love?: right now? FUCK YEAH....LAURN I LOVE U!!
(209) Do you consider your significant other hot?: whats significant other mean???
(210) What would you do if you were walking down the street and saw some hot guy/girl standing on the sidewalk?: ummmm........idk
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...
(211) That haunted you?: no1
(212) You wanted to kill?: none i wanna kill alota people at the same time
(213) That you laughed at?: lauren
(214) That laughed at you?: um.....i dont know
(215) That turned you on?: ummm….my bf
(216) You went shopping with?: umm...myself
(217) That broke your heart?: laura m.....but thats all over now so it doesnt matter
(218) To disappoint you?: ummmm...........no1
(220) To make you cry?: ummmmm.......saddly laura m......i dont kno why but i got sad 4 some reason like 4 months ago maybe longer
(221) To brighten up your day?: lauren.....she also brightened up my night
(222) That you thought about?: lauren
(223) You saw a movie with?: lauren,mia,steve,brain,meri
(224) You talked to on the phone?: lauren
(225) You talked to through IM?: lauren
(226) You saw?: grandma
(227) You lost?: no1
(229) You thought was completely insane?: preps.......and feminem fans
(230) You wanted to be?: VIOLENT J
(231) You told off?: um.......melissa....dont kno hew last name.....i made fun of her
(232) You trusted?: alex wasserman
(233) You turned down?: idk
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU
(234) Smiled?: when ever i was talking to lauren or tinking of her
(235) Laughed?: 2 hours ago
(236) Cried?: 5 months ago
(237) Bought something?: condoms on saterday
(238) Danced?: in the shower 2day
(239) Were sarcastic?: i dont know do it to much
(240) hugged someone?: the last time I saw lauren
(241) Talked to an ex?: ummm like an hour ago
(242) Watched your fave movie?: ummmmmm....idk havent seen the goonies in a while :'(
(243) Had a nightmare: got rapped at gun point by a girl after watching the movie "the smokers" see it its a good movie
(245) Talked on the phone?: 9ish
(246) Listened to the radio?: in the car like an hour ago
(247) Watched TV?: right now
(248) Went out?: outside? Umm I went outside like an hour ago in order to get to the car which I listend to the radio in
(249) Helped someone?: I don’t remember
(250) Were mean?: I kicked brian in the balls the other day….realllly hard
(251) Sang?: like 2 min ago
(252) Saw a movie in a theater?: I think it was friday
(253) Said "I love you"?: 2day
(254) Missed someone?: now.....i miss lauren
(255) Fought with a family member?: dont live my mom so dont fight with her that often anymore
(256) Fought with a friend?: i dont know
(257) Had a serious conversation?: yestorday
(258) Got drunk?: 4days ago
(259) Had sex?: ummmmm lets see.....that would have to be saterday!
series 1 ]
Name: matt
Birthday: Aug. 23rd
Birthplace: RVC
Current Location: RVC
Eye Color: blue
Hair Color: dirty blond
Righty or Lefty: righty
Zodiac Sign: Virgo
Font: idk
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 2 - your favorite ]
Music: anything psycopathic records
Cartoon: futurama
Color: black pink and green
Car: mustang
Slushy Flavor: cherry
Magazine: ummmmm.......last 1 i looked at was online.....it was an ezein dont kno the name but it was pron.........it was like 3 weeks ago
TV Show: futurama
Song at the Moment: none
Language: English
Spice Girl: all
Food & Beverage: ummmm....FAYGO muda fucko
Subject in School: my off period
Weekend Activity: different things |
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